“My mouth will tell of your righteous acts, of your deeds of salvation all the day, for their number is past my knowledge.” ~Psalm 71:15
There are some days that I just feel sick. That just means that my immune system is too busy and is getting swamped. But my immune system is swamped because some of the nasty little bugs are dying–so I say, praise the Lord!
Today is one such day when I just feel sick; I have a headache, I feel rather weak, and am just slightly achy all over. I’ve been slightly increasing my “bug-killers” for the borrelia, babesia, bartonella, and protomyxoa rhumatica over the past couple of weeks and I’m beginning to see where I should set newer, higher daily doses…. I’ll be going to see a new doctor next month–about which I am a little excited, though also a bit trepidatious.
But I was writing here today to mention a few ways in which I have been blessed by God in the past couple of months, specifically in regard to my Lyme et al. A few of my symptoms are almost entirely gone–things like that terrible near-paranoia that was frightening me last summer and the intense and frequent shakiness I have had off and on for some while–also, while the foggy, darkened mind I have so struggled with the past year or so is definitely still with me, there have been an increasing number of bright spots when I’ve even been able to read and comprehend and remember what I’ve read. These few days here and there have made me quite happy and it causes me to be even more willing to wait through the treatment time and continue on with as vigorous treatment as I know how at this time–for to have a little taste of getting my mind back is very encouraging. I still don’t have hardly any creativity stirring within me; I still feel fatigued a great deal, but I am feeling glad and hopeful and stubborn all at once right about now….
Strangely enough, what seems to be the most difficult symptom I am dealing with today isn’t this headache and the accompanying poor eyesight, but that my hair is thinning as my body is detoxing…but, clearly, that is only difficult because of my vanity, as it is really a rather harmless symptom…. Regardless of this, there are other ways in which great encouragement has been given to me by the Lord in recent days which has lightened my heart and restored a joy to my daily thoughts–God has blessed me by bringing my family back under the same roof, he has given me a new friend, and he continues to draw me along the road of life under his sanctifying hand and in the love of Christ, the Lord. My life is not perfect, but it is blessed.
Truly, the Lord is very good to me.